I am a Perfectionist….and I hate it!
This morning after getting the kids ready and out the door I put together a list of things I needed to get done by 12. I made a cup of tea, put in my headphones and fired up the laptop and….yeah, nothing. All the brilliant ideas I had just sat on the screen looking at me, telling me something was wrong with the font, the pictures I chose, the colors, EVERYTHING WAS WRONG!
I shut down and watched #LHHNY instead. But as I listened to Cardi B chatter on about getting her teeth fixed and how she loved with who she was before I realized that it there wasn’t anything wrong with the work I was doing, it was that perfection monster that was wrong.
I took a moment and looked back through my notebook to see just how many of the many ideas I completed and there were very few. A lot of amazing, honest pieces written but never posted with notes in my hand writing “Can people relate to this?” “Find a better way to say this” and one I saw often “Really Ra, you sound mean, rewrite it” and it is that self criticism, that need to appeal to and sound perfect that keeps stepping in the way of what is destiny.
So today, I’m going to try to stop that. Every picture won’t be a Lorna Simpson classic, every font won’t be perfect and I’m a mom, there will be toys and an occasional sock in my latest video and I’m going to try hard to be okay with that.
Time to stop stepping on my own toes and living my life as fearlessly as I did on the ‘Street.